My weight has reached an all time high since I don't know when. I really don't know what to do. I wish this would all just go away on its own. I feel beyond disgusting. It seems so easy... it should be easy. I have been so  depressed lately Its like I've completely let myself go. Every dream I had has been based around some sort of perfection, now I have no hope. All my aspirations to become an actress, a model, a dancer, a graceful ballerina have been demolished. Squashed like a tiny little ladybug by pounds of useless fat, stretch marks, lose skin hanging off this cage they call "my body" and a complete lack of self control. Of course there's a light at the end of the tunnel, its just way too dark in here to see it.